 Qatar
Classic EN BREF issue #6Everything you never knew you needed to know about Doha ... |
 MIC DOOMED… The Voice of Squash had a few mic problems on this tournament… On the opening night, his microphone wouldn't work as he started to present the evening, and on semi finals day, he went through three microphones before he got one that worked… My explanation is that the mics cannot stand the concurrence of that warm and talented Welsh voice of his…  |
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DS BH… I got you there, didn’t I??? You know that I use code to write my notes on matches. DS is obviously drop shot, and BH, backhand. Well, it’s the code I’ve been using the most, both for men and women, as it would seem that this court is extremely rewarding on the left front corner… You are learning things everyday reading this column, aren’t you??? |
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The
QSF had kindly organised a party for all the players/officials
in the beautiful Four Seasons hotel, a stunning amazing
astonishing complex with “les Pieds dans l’Eau”, “feet into the
sea” as we say in French, meaning that you actually dine on the
beach, near the superb swimming pools. 
NICOL DAVID FAN
CLUB… The
young star has got a great following of Malaysian supporters
wherever she goes, and two thirds of the crowd that was
watching the semi between herself and Vicky were Malaysian… They
must have been very disappointed after her defeat, as most of
them left right after the match. Only a few of them stuck
around for the rest of the evening.On a personal note, I was a bit surprised by some of those supporters (actually the ones who left - not any of those pictured here) who were systematically clapping every unforced error by Vicky … Manners, guys, manners… |
DRIVING
US AWAY… From far, this has been the best organisation of all the
tournament I’ve been in the transport department…  Normally, you have shuttles that take you from the hotel to
the venue (apart from New York, as the Hyatt is situated
yards/metres away from Grand Central Station where the glass
court is erected) depending, normally every hour…But here, none of that. They have an army of drivers on stand-by, and the minute you step in the hotel lounge or outside the venue, you have a driver to take you back… I’ve never waited more than 1 minute to have a car, at any time we started or finished… I LOVE DOHA!!!!!!!!!!! |
| Qatar Classic EN BREF issue #5 |
GOUGHIE YET AGAIN… What
would I do with my favourite Welshman, I ask you…Every day, he comes up with a new one, and today, as he just finished playing yet again a superb match against Davide, he went straight to my throat : “You keep on saying I’m 35, but I’m 34 still! I’ll be 35 in two weeks, the first day of the world Team event in Islamabad actually. ” Yeah right, big difference… But he went on: “I’m so so happy… By the way, you’ve never see me play a quarter-final have you, mind you, it’s been a while…” “Sorry, Gough, I wasn’t born…” I let you to imagine the floury language he kindly dispatched on your servant… |
 HONG KONG PREDICTIONS So, who do we have who is going to be fiery and hungry for the World Open? We have Lee, Peter, Shabana, Nick, and Jonathon. Unfortunately, Lee, Peter and Shabana are on the same side of the draw, but on the other side, we've got Nick and Jonathon, who I'm sure will be recovered by then... So, now, let's have YOUR predictions...
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 SORRY
GIRLS…I need to apologise to all the ladies that were playing on the traditional court, as I really really couldn’t follow any of their matches. I had 10 matches going on on the glass court, and only 10 fingers, half a brain and very little strength left… I also apologise to Anthony and Olli, whose match I purely ignored, for timing reasons only, I assure you… |
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 WHERE
THE HECK IS GRANT???You will never know the funny/embarrassing thing that happened to Adrian during his match against Nick Matthew, as I wrote my story, and text him to ask his permission to publish it. Unfortunately, the boy has vanished into air… He never came to the venue today, and didn’t reply to my text. Blast! It was a good one, I tell you. Oh well, I’ll get him next time… |
| Qatar Classic EN BREF issue #4 |
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FACT… Just before the opening ceremony, I was chatting with a few players, including Vanessa Atkinson, Linda Elriani and Jonathon Power (wearing a superb black shirt, absolutely stunning) and I happened to notice that Vanessa was wearing an exquisite necklace, extremely original. “It’s a gift from LJ”, she said, “and I was quite surprised how beautiful it was, because although I pointed out that brand of jewellery to him, there are things they do I don’t like, and he really chose something I do like a lot”.  “Oh
well”, I smiled, “that’s luuuuuve for you, Vanessa”.But the Magician cut me off : “No, it’s not love, it’s luck!” he burst out laughing. “When we men succeed to find a gift that pleases you ladies, it pure luck!” So there you have it, girls. And with Christmas coming up, the question is, do you feel lucky????
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 COMING OUT Well, I heard the rumour for a little while, but as long as Joe didn’t “come out” with it officially and authorised me to talk about it, I was not going to talk about it now, was I… Well, now you have it, Mr Joseph Kneipp has found happiness again, and is a changed man. The lucky girl is one of the WISPA ladies, Daniella Schumann. And may I say that I’m relieved, as seeing him so unwell, both in his life and in his squash, was heartbreaking. So, welcome back to life, Joe…  |
 SWIMMING
POOL“Did you enjoy the swimming pool yet?” a player asked me today at breakfast. And when do you want me to have had the time to go to the blipping pool??? Since we arrived, I’ve finished working about 3am, and been up between 7 and 8 am to finish the work off, then straight to the venue… So there are a few red noses around due to excess of sun, but trust me, I’m as white as it comes… But heck, I will get to the pool before I leave… I will, I will, I will…! |
| Qatar Classic EN BREF issue #3 |
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JE NE PARLE
PAS L’ANGLAIS… You would think that after 12 years living in England, I would start understanding English, wouldn’t you? Nope.  Yesterday,
Alex Gough approached me and laughed “I’ve got two things to say to
you. One, after you ask the spelling of the name of my partner, you
still spelled it wrong, Annabel takes two n's, and then, you said that
her analysis was the same than yours, whereas in fact she said exactly
the opposite of what you said.”That started well…
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LATASHA: DO NOT APPROACH IN THE MORNING… You get to learn about the players and their little habits when you go on
tour, and one of the most typical cases of “non morning person” is Latasha Khan.The first time I met her, in Qatar actually a few months back, was at breakfast during the WISPA event, and I honestly thought she hated me. She was grumpy, didn’t even reply to my hello, and didn’t speak to me for the whole of the meal. Then I saw her again in St Louis, at the Party (so in the evening), and she was soooo charming, and complimentary about our work, and so friendly. OK, I thought, maybe she knows me a bit better now then… But hell no, yesterday morning, we shared the same car to go to the venue, and zoom, here we were again, not a word, not a smile… To the point I really thought I did something wrong without realising it. “Oh no, Framboise”, she laughed her head off, “I didn’t have my coffee yet this morning, that’s all! I’m not a morning person, and until I’m fully awake, I’m not exactly sociable!....” “Yes”, confirmed Natalie Grinham who was with her at the time, “that’s Latasha alright”. Like I said, you’ve got to be on the tour to learn about people’s ways, and by the way, you don’t want to see or speak to me before I have my first tea…. No, I mean it… |
And
today, polite, adorable | OUPS… I just love Linda Elriani. Not only because she married a adorable compatriot of mine, Laurent. Not only because she is a very talented and spirited player. But also because she’s got a great sense of humour.   She was quietly watching a match, chatting happily with Adrian Grant,
waiting to get a massage with Pauline, Phil Newton’s wife, yes, you do know
Phil, he’s been writing for us not only for Kaleidoscope, but he is also our
“Mr Physio” in our clinic.Profiting from a short interruption during a match, having spotted Mrs Newton waiting for her near the entrance door, she decided to quickly leave her seat and get out of the court area.  Well,
SHE maybe decided to leave, but her lovely long white skirt decided that it
wouldn’t mind having another look at the match, and stuck to the chair.Thank God I was right behind her, and nobody else than me had any chance to admire Mrs Elriani's gorgeous curves, but it was still hysterically funny, as the English Lady had to sit back on her seat as promptly as possible… Blushing away, she eventually found the strength to stop laughing and left the room peacefully, but I must say WE had a great time…. Not sure about Linda, but we did… |
| Qatar Classic EN BREF issue #2 |
| ALWAYS A DRAMA
GOING ON…  Yes, I know, I’m creating chaos everywhere I go. After the glasses drama,
I had forgotten my camera batteries, and had only one set in the flashing
machine. So immediately, I asked Gamal if it was possible to go back to
the hotel, or to send one of the drivers to buy a few for me…A few minutes later, I was given 8 batteries, brand new… that didn’t work. OK, panic, as when I got to use them, Alex/Hisham was being played, and match of the day Ben/Renan was also happening… Not to mention that I was supposed to take a special photo of one of the players for Robert Edwards, something to do with the Closing Ceremony…  Back and forth, forth and back between the Press Room and the courts to
try and get people to lend me money to send another driver to buy some
good old Duracell or Energizer, looking yet again like a lunatic on a
mission…Thanks to Gamal and his team, and to Robert who authorised me to send his personal driver to the supermarket, I eventually got three sets of the blipping stuff… By that time, of course, never got to see the matches…. A normal day at the office really… |
HOT WEATHER… WHERE????  If you’ve never been in a country blessed with warm weather, like the
Arab States, or Africa, you may not be aware of the disparity of the state
of affairs that pushes you to undress when you go outside, and overdress
when inside!Air conditioning has got to be pushed quite hard to prevent condensation on the courts, so basically, in all the countries where air con is necessary, I’ve been freezing to death! But the pros of the tour are now used to it, and have adapted, like Natalie Grinham for example, who brings outfits with matching adorable gloves… Why didn’t I think of that!  And last evening, I was soooo cold that Laura Jane
Lengthorn kindly
proposed her socks to me, proposition that may appear slightly weird for
an outsider, but for which I will be eternally grateful, especially as she
ended up barefoot in her shoes…Hot weather? I don’t think so…. |
 BREAKFAST
BARKER…This morning at breakfast, I saw young Mr Barker arriving with a box under his arm. When I got closer, I realised that he was actually carrying a “Fruit & Fibre” cereal box… “I bought it yesterday in the supermarket,” he said a little embarrassed. “I have it every morning at home, and they don’t have it here in the buffet so…” Everybody knows how important diet is for a top athlete, and I’m glad to see that Peter is one of those great professionals that are health conscious… But still, it was a bit funny to see him arriving with his cereal box… |
| Qatar Classic EN BREF issue #1 |
| LOOKED AFTER LIKE
A PRINCESS… Everyone around here has been doing their utmost best to make my life as easy as possible…  Between
Hussein the physio who has been attended to a blocked solid neck,
IT man Wissam who set me up with a working internet connection in a
few minutes. Gamal,
our technical secretary who has been providing me with all the paperwork,
draw, score sheets, etc.Aladdin, the Tournament Ref and National Coach, who welcomed me by “I just love your site, I’m following all the squash world from there.”  And
of course, Robert Edwards, the Voice of Squash, who is
orchestrating the whole of us with a firm but gentle hand, I feel home…What can I say, I just love Doha… |
FUNNY FRENCH… Here I was trying to interview Sir Simon after his difficult match against Phil, when my camera disappeared. “But, I’m sure I put it on the table” I thought.  Too
obvious, it had to be a funny little joker who had picked it up. And it was. Lovely Renan Lavigne appeared a few seconds later, and as in by inadvertence, put it back where I left it. Then a few minutes later, it was now Greg Gaultier who was trying to “watch the pictures” and was touching all the buttons around. “Oh no you don’t” I firmly stated, while recovering my precious camera. “What are you afraid of?” laughed Greg. “That I’m going to erase your pictures”. “Yes, exactly”. Ah those French, incroyable, aren’t they???  |
| LOST AND FOUND… I’m getting old… Well, yes, what can I say… I now need reading glasses when I try to read my notes and feel lost without them. And panic invaded me when, at the end of play, I couldn’t find my glasses anywhere… “Well”, I thought, “they can’t have gone far as I haven’t left the premises”. And there I go back to the courts, to the changing rooms, to the glass court, look everywhere….  By that time, Robert Edwards, my “Voice of Squash” has been asking everybody about them, and has five people looking everywhere - under the seats, behind the courts ... Nothing. So here I am, typing away, more from memory I must admit than by reading the “scribbling” on my blocknotes. And I finish my reports, send them, and start to pack up… While unplugging the internet, I knock the paper basket near my table… And there they are, my baby blesses lovely glasses that I love and cherish… They must have dropped from my shirt where I normally hang them as I got my jacket off… God love me, somebody’s got to… |